Am I Too Fat, Old, Out of Shape, Unprepared, and Untalented to Go to Eventing Horse Camp?

Razzy in 2015 Photo Credit Anissa Cottongim

Hmm.  Yes, no, yes, yes, totally yes and yes.  But, you know what?  I’m going anyway.

• The What:  Winter Camp with Tik Maynard & Sinead Halpin Maynard 
• The Where: Majestic Oaks Ocala 
• The When: OMG — next weekend!  December 27 -30th. 
• The Who: a 51 year old amateur with a day job, a farm, and a side business (me)  and Razzy (H. Wineglass Shiraz, a 13 year old Hungarian Felver mare - my main ride) and Spider (Gossamer, (Ghostzapper x Take D’Tour (Tour D’Or) 4 year old OTTB who’s had a year off and might be an RRP prospect – who is going along for the ride) 
• The Why:  Well, that’s more complicated.  See below. 

I’ve been on the DL for a while now, which is a fancy way of saying that I’ve had some medical/injury/laziness issues that have kept me off of my horse over the last year.

At the beginning of 2019, I was so pumped and excited to take back my riding, and to finally get out and do some things with my very nice horse.  I made arrangements to send her down to Pear Tree Ranch with Jake and Steph Biernbaum, where I was confident that Jake could sort out her issues with her canter, and let me know if what I felt was, in fact, fear and if not, tell me if it was a physical issue and I needed to consider retiring her.

Razzy and Jake going back to basics.

My plan was to make an investment in her training, get some answers, and make a plan for the rest of the year.  Well, you know what “they” say about horses and plans?  It’s true. So true.

I’m totally minding my own business, and a friend says “hey, what do you think of this horse?” And gives me a link to a Facebook listing (folks you are never Just Looking where horses are concerned!) where someone is helping to re-home a thoroughbred at Gulfstream Park.  I had been casually keeping my eye out for a stout, on the short side, bay mare, just in case the right one came along.  This was NOT that.

The next thing I know, I’ve agreed to take a rising 4 year old colt with what appears to be a 75% core lesion in the SFDT.  

Because I’m a special kind of stupid, that’s why.  He needed a soft place to land, and I specialize in Horses With Issues who won’t need to work hard.  And I’m not very bright — had I mentioned that?

Pretty ugly ultrasound.

So, instead of doing a deep dive into the terrific training Razzy was getting with Jake, I squeeze in a few visits that are much shorter than I’d like, because someone has to be at home to hand walk, muck a stall, and wrap the big doofus that has landed in my barn.

Razzy gets good training though, and I bring her home to high hopes of getting much progress made once we are on the other side of Red Hills. (I work as a volunteer for our largest international event, Red Hills Horse Trials in Tallahassee, and it takes a lot of time in late February, early March.)

But I sure am cute!

Then, rather than heading to RHHT on the first Saturday in March, I take my first ride in an ambulance to an overnight hospital stay.

Pro tip:  If your heart rate hits 204 and stays there, do not continue moving the round pen panels “because I wasn’t finished.”  You will end up in the ER.  This is not fun, and frankly, the ambulance ride was not nearly as luxurious as I had hoped.  Turns out I have  SVT (supraventricular tachycardia).  In layman's terms, my heart has an extra electrical circuit and when the electrical rhythm jumps to that circuit, the heartrate will not drop as it should.  Typically, this is not life threatening to “normal” people who recognize signs that something is wrong and stop what they are doing. Stubborn horse people?  Not so much.

Meanwhile, in March, doofus has “brain surgery,” a re-scan of the leg (which looks great at 60 days), and moves outside.  So, surely now I will get back on my horse and on a schedule.

Spider at sunset.

Seriously cute.  And I still have growing to do!

Not so fast, my friend.  Shortly after the cardiologist cleared me in early May, a nice lady smashes into my car in the parking garage at work.  Only a 10 mph collision,  it still destroys the front end of my car, and apparently angers a disc in my lower back. I spend the next 6 months trying to relieve the pain there.  Finally,  I get to the right physical therapist who figures it out. (More on that process later.  What I wish I’d known!). I ended up at my highest weight ever a couple of months ago.  I have since lost about 20 lbs, but I am still way fluffier than your average event rider.  It has been quite a year.

Nonetheless, when I saw the announcement for the Winter Camp, I immediately knew I had to figure out a way to be able to go. (I did mention I was a special kinda of stupid, didn’t I?)  Even unable to walk well, even barely able (at that point) to get on my own fat pony, even as hairy and out of shape as she was and I was — I HAD to find a way to go.

I’ve wanted to go to horse camp, well, since forever.  I had at least two friends go to the O’Connor’s Event Camps over the years, and it has been on my bucket list ever since.  The last time they had one in Ocala, I was newly divorced, and still young enough to see possibilities forever, and thought “Oh,  I’m not ready, it is too expensive right now, I can’t be gone from home, I’ll do it someday . . .” Only they haven’t held one in Florida since.  Now, even though all those “wouldn’t it be better to wait?” things are still present, I’m not waiting this time.

I have my horses at home, and ride 100% of the time alone, do chores alone, hang out in the barn alone.  The chance to immerse myself in all things eventing for four days, hang out with my horses with like minded people and watch lessons has me incredibly excited.

Dennis is concerned.  I don’t blame him. I’ve been able to ride a bit over the last two months, and my mare has been Really Good.  But the last time I went to a clinic, away, all by myself, he had to come and fetch me when an unintended dismount resulted in 10 weeks non-weight bearing due to a tibial plateau fracture.  He’s worried, and frankly, so I am I. Because worry is what I do.  But, on the other hand, I don’t want to regret being afraid to try.

It has been a long time since I’ve written anything, but my goal is to write about this process and this trip, and thereby spare my family, friends, and co-workers from having to listen to me talk about it non-stop.  Follow along to learn more than you’ve ever wanted to know about being an older ammie realizing her dreams of playing with ponies.